Evolution

It's that time of year again. New year. New me,

If the socials are anything to go by, I noticed that we've grown as a community. We've grown out of the 'New Year, New Me' pressure, and it's about time!

For me, personally, I still adopt the new me mantra, but it's a slightly adapted version. I like to think of December as a month to pause, slow down, and reflect; January is a chance to start something new. I like feeling like I'm turning the page, a new chapter in my life. I used to use my birthdays as a reflection marker, but recently, January works better. 

Last year, one thing that was a huge revelation for me was understanding the source of my frustration and disappointment: the quest to get back to the Phil that existed before I became a mum. That was a one-way road to hell and filled my days with a sense of unfulfillment.

I'm happy to say the person on that path is gone. I can never be the old Phil anymore, and I've accepted that. And now that I have, my whole outlook on life has changed. 

Instead of trying to go back and recreate the magic of my child-free years, I'm accepting where I am now. The fact of the matter is, I have a child, and I have a different lifestyle. Yearning and pining for what was is not going to change that. 

Instead, I have the power to create a new vision, look forward to the realities of what I have, and make the most of it instead of wasting time. It's a concept that sounds so simple but is very hard to master.

Looking back over the past six months, I've adopted that mentality, and I've just felt my life change in more positive and eye-opening ways. I'm living in the moment, in the present, instead of in the past. When I stop and open my eyes, I can pay attention to the love, joy and support I have around me. 

There's so much pressure in life, you know, the pressure of the new mum to snap back. To still be who she was, but it's ok to not be that person anymore. Give yourself permission to grow and evolve. 

I'm embracing evolution. I'm embracing change. I'm so excited about what the future holds and my potential because every day I wake up is a new day. A unique chance for opportunity, and as I see it now, every year is a new chance for growth. I don't have to be the same person. I'm in control of that, and I hope you guys get to a place where you learn this lesson too. It's a valuable one that can really bring joy, peace and happiness to your life.

Image Credits

Photographer: Phillip Raheem

Make Up, Styling, Art direction: Philomena Kwao

Hair: Braids by Nancy